Are porn movies bad for us? And violent video games?

365 texts habits self-knowledge
Letters

Goal of the day: 445 words. Written: 583.

I've had some correspondence with the Cloud Islanders. There's not much research here - just ideas.

"Hello Daniel, I would like to know your opinion on a topic. It's very unsavoury (in an indirect sense). Porn videos. What is it? How do they change ( if they do) a couple's relationship? Can one become addicted to them? Isn't it a kind of betrayal (if the films are watched in secret), because when you watch porn you are not really thinking about, say, your wife or husband for scientific purposes - so that you can do something similar to her or him later. What do you think about this? Thank you."

Well, that's a good topic 🙂

  1. These are just videos. Only. The same as Fifty Shades of Grey, the animated Wait for it or LRT Panorama. They are not magical in a way that makes them stand out. You can already tell from the variety - they are quite different, so you should understand that different people are stimulated by different images. Some people even like to watch people eat or do extreme skydiving.
  2. Nor do the videos themselves magically change relationships. Relationships change with people, not with films, hobbies or objects. If the couple is doing well together, that's fine. If one of you is upset, the solution, as with any conflict, is to explain your position, not to get angry.If you are really committed to each other, you spit on the videos and do something different.
  3. You won't become dependent on them. Courtfor a rather amusing reason may become harder to satisfy: Live sex is simply ridiculous. All the noises, the sweat, the backaches, the gasps for air and strength... Or, even more so, sometimes just not having the strength and the mood. :)) Anyway, you don't develop an addiction to porn films, if someone says otherwise, ask for research. So far, since the beginning of the last century, scientists have never found a clear link between frequent porn viewing and addiction.
  4. And (non-)betrayal again depends on the relationship. How do you feel about this? When I'm friends with girls, for example, I don't really care what they think when they watch porn - I just know that they love me and not some dude on a square screen. 🙂 Actually, I've read in some relationship books that porn is a pretty good way to solve dilemmas when you have a fetish, but your partner isn't attracted to it. Not attracted to it - there's nothing to force. You enjoy the fantasy and continue to love your wife/husband.

It's easy! There's no magic here!

"It doesn't seem so simple to me 🙂 Thanks for your opinion, I appreciate it, but what would you say about computer games with a lot of brutality, violence, etc. (like that's the kind of thing that attracts me)? Don't you think they affect the human psyche? Doesn't it lead to aggression in a similar situation? The mind doesn't care whether it's real or not - it sees, it feels, and the images it sees irritate the consciousness. Is there something else?"

It's the same with games as it is with films (porn or no porn).

In fact, it's even the same as with rock music. Did you know that in our grandparents' generation, there were those who were convinced that rock and roll (and AC/DC of all things) promotes child abuse, violence and mental damage?

Yes, I'm completely serious. 🙂

Again, there is no evidence of damage. It does not exist. People will always be afraid of anything that is even slightly new. By now, by the way, you should have noticed that the fear of video games is a myth of the last decade - today VR games are on the rise.

Anyway, it's an interesting digression: there are those who say that porn or sexy films (here's a myth from the 90s) encourage exaggerated sexuality in adolescents, so they engage in risky sex and so on. Even though the statistics just show that sexuality has even declined in younger generations. Probably because there is more entertainment now. (In the US, there are statistics about higher pregnancy rates in seasons when it rains or snows a lot).

Well, I digress.

No, video games do not harm human consciousness. Our minds are too powerful to really know the difference when the situation is real. And just because you feel excited when you play (I recently played World of Warcraft and even my heart was racing in a tense match), it doesn't mean you are being harmed.

Thoughtful,
Daniel

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