Who are you - a person or a Facebook profile? (Cure for Facebook)

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Today I'm going to step out of my usual comfort zone and share facts about myself that no one in the world knows. Most of these confessions are very intimate to me, so it was difficult to write them.

All I ask of you: read the introduction to the confessions. And then share in the comments below one fact about yourself, which no one knows either. Thank you!

Do you sometimes feel less accomplished than those around you? Someone nobody knows? Can't find what makes you unique?

You may have contracted Facebookitis.

Yes, that's a word I just made up. And since I'm the creator of the word, I get a chance to define it:

Facebookitis is a psychological disease that spreads by itself. Characterized by impaired self- and others' assessment skills. Symptoms of the disease: sadness, depression and diminished opportunities for personal growth.

Sound scary? And it should. The truth is that Facebook can be cured.

What do you FORGET when you judge others and yourself?

Short task: Remember that one extremely successful, all-around very cool, intelligent person who attracts hundreds of fans. Yes, THAT cunt who is a little (or more) jealous of his luck and would love to trade places.

How do you rate him/her? Compare what that person has achieved with what you have achieved.

...Do you feel that uneasy feeling coming over you?

I don't know about you, but these comparisons only make me sadder - I want to run to the kitchen and crush a kilo of cookies.

Of course, a good part of what you compared a moment ago is not equivalent. After all, they have had very different experiences than you. Or they were just more successful... Somewhere in the back of your mind, you really comfort yourself like that.

But do you realize?

The problem here is not the comparison. The trouble comes when we FORGET why we look and are different.

Why do you think others are doing better? This short video illustrates it well:

How to discover yourself?

What is the worst part of Facebook?

No, it's not that it's full of ads, that it only shows what it wants to show, or that its design is weird. 1

The biggest problem with Facebook and any other social network is that there is NO bad news.

Let me explain. Imagine you went to your best friend's birthday party. And you took 300 or so photos in it.

Question. Will you upload them all? Or will you choose only the most beautiful and the best?

Real life vs Facebook

Of course, choose the option where you look better. Almost everyone people choose to show their better side whenever they can.

It's natural - it's nice when others like you or something related to you. (For more, in English: Need of Esteem, Reciprocal liking.)

Only here three problems arise:

  1. This creates illusions that you are doing better than you really are.
  2. This causes the inflation of good experiences (beautiful photos, videos, music...). Really good news loses its value when EVERYTHING is treated like a fantastic, amazing, incredible single piece of news.
  3. And finally, small problems start to seem huge.

When you see only the good things, you start not appreciating them. Searching for better things leads to sadness and depression. And the bad things start to seem disproportionately horrible.

Your worldview is crumbling and things are only looking worse. It may not even be bad, it just seems like it is. 2

I don't want you to experience this. Therefore, I suggest:

open up Show the real YOU to your family, friends and the rest of the world. Forget the bad, forget the good. At all, forget everything. Instead, present your pure self. Pure without changes and improvements. However, only by showing the REAL you will you understand that you are not a one-sided person.

This is the only way you will understand that others are not one-sided either. Only by opening up will you become your true self. Enough of pretending to be a saint.

So here is the task for you:

  1. Head down to the comments below for this article.
  2. And share one fact about yourself, which no one in the world knew until now. It could be anything.

...The only thing that matters is that it is true and sincere. 🙂

And if you already did, here's the part you've been waiting for:

33 facts you didn't know about me. Or what the real Daniel is like.

1. I like to work like an idiot. Every lovely day.

Yes, that's me in a James Bond pose giving milk for my birthday.

2. In September 2013, I tried to get a military rank, but I quickly changed my mind after swearing a soldier's oath to Lithuania.

In June of that year, I was seriously interested in trying the junior officer training, passed all the medical tests and stayed there for exactly a month.

I dropped them because I believed that training (and the rest of my military career) required one hundred percent commitment to go all the way. The dedication I had already given to art. I could have continued my training, but I declined the opportunity.

3. I adore order and tidying up. 

Organizing is one of my biggest hobbies. Things, databases, thoughts, ideas, people and other systems. That's what I like - to put things in their best places, to throw away everything that interferes with life.

I love it so much that I clean not only my house, but also my friends' houses. Of course, if they don't panic about it, like crazy.

4. I didn't get into art high school because I lacked imagination.

Or at least that was the official reason. When I was 11 years old (future fifth grader), my godparents tried to enroll me in the Kaunas Art Gymnasium. I failed the final test, still life drawing.

I don't know what you expected from me, because drawing a still life with equations is not an activity that requires a lot of imagination... Am I wrong?

5. I like to shell walnuts by hand.

Isn't that fun? Take it and squeeze it, and it crunches when you squeeze it! I crunched against the tabletop, crunched between my fingers, crunched with my teeth.

(By the way, buying shelled nuts seems like sacrilege to the nut eating ceremony to me!)

6. I was once rejected by a girl. Then I started learning the science of communication and hooking up girls.

There was a time when dealing with female beings was a pain for me. I just didn't know what to say to them.

After that painful rejection, I started learning Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) 3 and communication psychology to prevent this from happening again.

I should really thank this girl (Gerda, if you're reading this, it's you), because she helped me overcome my fear of communication. Thank you.

7. I sometimes work so much that I forget to eat.

It is part of my diet. Why eat dinner when there are so many unread books and unwritten articles?

8. I would make a terrible editor.

I can read a text 5 times and still miss a bunch of spelling and punctuation mistakes. It's like a spell! 4

9. I spent three years creating a fantasy encyclopedia… Until I forgot about it.

"The world is a novel, a set of maps and an encyclopedia in one. For the true fantasy fan.”

That was the motto of this creation. I spent three years creating and re-creating a giant fantasy encyclopedia. You can still find her unfinished encyclopedia online: "The World".

While creating, I did not manage to put all ideas into this encyclopedia. Most of the creations have sunk into separate pages and drawers.

Climate zones of the world. The original (huge)

10. Of my six closest friends, four are girls.

I don't even know how it happened. But it turns out that I am better at communicating with girls than with boys.

(Or: how about the fact that I met three of the four girls for the first time on dates. *cough, cough*)

11. Once, my school friend Ernests and I blew up the toilet of a cafe.

It turns out that the water in the toilet does not manage to extinguish the burning firecracker. Who would have thought? I still remember running through the door of the cafe, across Vilnius Street and back to school. We didn't go there again. The reason? Hey, who needs a reason for 15-year-old beeps?

12. When I was 13, I almost lost my head.

The math: bike + steep hill - helmet + downhill + water = a damn bad combination. In the crash, I managed to split my head open in the forehead AND the back of my head.

13. My cooking skills (until recently) were tragic.

Seriously, the most complicated recipe I've ever mastered is boiled and fried pasta without sauces. And once, while baking pancakes, I managed to forget about them for half an hour and came back to find carbon and a lot of smoke. I learned how to cook better when I was 24 or so. About half a year ago from this moment. 5 🙂

14. I memorize the Green Gherkin song and sing it when it rains.

If you haven't seen this cartoon yet, here it is:

15. I like to sing while walking and I sing everywhere.

For example, on Laisvė avenue, in some forest or on the Acropolis. Repertoire from the old school hymn to Frank Sinatra's "Strangers in the night" (I love this song).

16. My taste in music is weird and I'm happy with it.

I listen to Lady Gaga, Caravan Palace, Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake, Frank Sinatra and everything in between. My music playlist is a cacophony of genres.

17. A few years ago I thought I was asexual.

To be honest, I still think so, but I'm not so sure anymore. It's possible that I'm just gray-asexual - feeling sexual desire, but only after close contact.

PS Sorry for being so formal, I just don't feel comfortable talking about this topic. As far as I know, asexuals are considered even more perverts than homosexuals. It doesn't take courage to talk about it out loud.

18. I have spent 360+ days of my life playing video games alone.

And no, I don't mean I played the games for a year straight. I mean, adding up all the games would add up to at least a year of PURE games. That's more than 10 thousand hours.

For seven years, I was a giant gaming geek. From the familiar Lineage II, to early teenage Runescape, to late teenage World of Warcraft.

That was me for a while. And yes, it's an elf with bunny ears.

According to my game statistics, which I kept for just three years out of those seven, I lost at least 5 months of my life. Purely.

It wasn't until I discovered a new hobby - learning how to communicate with girls - that I reduced the amount of time I spent playing games. True, I still play sometimes, but now the games are only an hour a week. 6 I can't stand it anymore.

19. I'm a giant jerk sometimes.

For example, half a year ago I wrote a 10,000-word novel... And I accidentally deleted it from my computer and from my Google Drive backup at the same time. I won't even talk about the exams I was late for or the birthdays I forgot.

20. I like Hollywood movies better than independent studios.

I don't know, maybe I just expect quality and fun entertainment from movies. After all, that's what movies are made for - entertainment. I get ideas better from books or talking to people.

21. I never understood poetry.

Sorry, poets, but your writings are completely incomprehensible to me. I know there are people who like poetry, but I'm not one of them.

22. I don't always do what I should do.

I read LOADS of books, articles, and other texts every week about living a healthier life, being productive, and building a career... But I'm not always able to follow the advice I get. Very often I don't put up with it and I don't do things the way I might be better off.

23. Sometimes I hate my alarm clock so much I want to throw it out the window.

Need more comments? You probably experience it in the mornings too.

24. I like watching my images in mirrors or windows.

Reflections often fascinate me. For some reason, at those moments I feel like I'm in a movie.

25. I love learning and can spend all day in encyclopedias.

I'm a bookworm and proud of it. Usually starting with a simple question about when the thrushes come back (yes, those are my daily questions), I end up via Wikipedia to Chinese history.

Learning together is also one of the reasons why I write. There is still a lot of room for me to grow in writing, blog maintenance, or solving problems for readers (yes, yours).

26. I often believe that if I don't prepare completely, I will fail.

I can't remember the last time I did something new that I didn't take twice as long to prepare for. For example, the first time I boiled an egg (probably the easiest recipe ever) I spent half an hour watching a video on the Internet on how to do it.

I'm not even talking about blog posts - I write them for 8-10 hours. And yes, I know it's crazy. I can't find the logic myself, but it's just normal for me.

27. I can be damn stubborn sometimes.

And often it is not to my advantage. When cooking that egg, I could have asked my parents how to do it, but I wanted to "do it myself". I sense that my stubbornness to do things my way is a pain to those close to me.

28. Did I mention that my memory is bad?

If you planned something with me, and I didn't write it down - think that I already forgot about it.

29. I have yet to taste an alcoholic drink that I like.

And I'm starting to think that alcohol doesn't taste good at all, and people who drink it don't drink it for the taste at all. (Granted, this doesn't explain beer or wine connoisseurs.)

30. I may have the taste buds of a twelve-year-old.

I have never tasted a delicious alcoholic drink, I love caramel ice cream with hazelnuts, I adore pasta, oranges and I just hate fish dishes. Oh, and yes, I sometimes eat chocolate cereal for breakfast.

31. When I was a child, I was very fond of doing various handicrafts.

It must have been my mother's influence, our house always had piles of materials, paper, spools of thread and needles, glue and paint. I still like to make things myself.

32. I want to learn to knit, but I'm not ready to start.

Can you imagine where to find a men's knitting club in Lithuania? Or just a knitting club somewhere in Kaunas? This would give me a bit of an incentive to knit those gloves I've always dreamed of.

33. I am afraid and worried at this moment.

My hands are shaking a little as I write these words. Because I'm afraid.

I don't know how you will evaluate these confessions of mine. I have no idea what to expect from your reaction.

But maybe it's just better?

...Maybe I feel alive only by being afraid?

I have no idea how you will respond. And I only ask one thing - join me. Share at least one fact about yourself that no one knows yet.

It's right there in the comments below. Sign in!

  1. Although this is also his problem.

  2. More in English: Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy.

  3. Which is NOT science and please don't make this mistake like I did.

  4. This text is edited by the wonderful editor Agnė Giniotytė. It would be worse without her.

  5. It helped that I moved into my own house, separate from my parents. There is no mother, there is skill!

  6. By the way, you can add me through Blizzard: Debesyla#2681. I still play World of Warcraft.

  • I like to cry, take my time, make a mess, take care of things without rushing, work only when I like, cry.

    • I heard from the author of one workshop for men (I don't remember, it was probably Saulius Bagdonas(?)) that screaming is one of the best ways to release inner strength for work. That's, hey, POWER!!

  • Hmmm….After this day, I still struggle with my smile. About 8 years ago I had inflammation of the facial nerve and my face has not fully recovered. I still have a complex for taking pictures, smiling openly and other strange things. I still can't come to terms with it and it bothers me. And I haven't found a way to get rid of the complex and fears about smiling. I'm afraid it's holding me back. And seeing people's perfect smiles and perfect days on FB doesn't always have a positive effect on me... Of course, you're happy to some extent because of your close friends, but when you have a "dog...day", it's such a demotivation....

    • Thanks for sharing, Jurgita! Don't you think that a smile is only a very small part of a person's appearance (and probably 0% his actions)? :')

  • Hey, good. Among your confessions were many of my confessions. True, mine is not a secret.
    Daniel, you write well. Really talented. (Oh, just so you know how rarely I use this epithet!)

    PS Agne Giniotyte, take a look at no. 13 (-:

  • Sometimes I think that I would like to live like a freegan, or at least look for something useful there. I often pass by the container and next to it I see another thing that could be useful for me, but I don't dare to take it because it seems to be low and I'm afraid of other people's looks.

    • Eh, what will the others do? If I find it, I take it - after all, it's better for everyone 🙂

  • A fact about me that no one knows:
    ♦ When I go to sleep, I cover all the mirrors. Stupid, but I'm calmer that way... :')
    ♦ Would love winter socks because they are winter. Christmas and warm... :'D
    Even 2 facts that no one knows! 😀

  • Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss?
    a fact no one knew is that when I was younger I tried to write poems and now I can't stand poetry :DDDD

  • Hi, I'm new here and I'm afraid of your negative review. In general, I care a lot about what is thought of me, I pretend that I am so important that everyone is only thinking about me, discussing my appearance in the pool, etc. I don't rate myself very positively in all areas. I'm still a control freak. I want everything according to my script. I spend too much time scrolling through my phone, facebook…

  • maybe off topic.. Facebook brought me to a person who made life no longer sweet. I would like to get rid of it, but I can't get rid of it :(((

  • I've had a bunch of fears since I was little. I was afraid of being different from most, but I didn't fit in very well at school. When I came to study, I was afraid to go to the city alone, because there are many strangers with blank stares. I am terrified of swimming if there is no bottom under my feet. Two years later, I'm still afraid to drive in the city, especially if no one is sitting next to me. In order to overcome stage fright, I once danced an oriental dance solo and when I got off the stage, I cried because of fear.

  • 1. When I meet a new person, after their name, I ask what their zodiac sign is. I am addicted to knowing what a person is like. I like to put them in certain categories and know who is possible to communicate with and who is not. I don't like most (or maybe all) Scorpios. If I find out that a person is a Scorpio, I stop communicating.
    2. I hate when someone drinks from my cup, glass, eats with my fork, spoon, knife.
    3. In the morning, I always do everything in a certain order. If it fails, the day is ALREADY ruined.
    4. I have not punched anyone in the face, but I would really like to.
    5. I can't listen when someone talks about an abused animal (not necessarily a pet).
    6. I have written 4 novels - only one of them has an ending.
    7. I often go into my fantasy and when I turn on the music, I start living in it - I imagine certain situations and act them out. It's very nerve-wracking when you have to come back to reality.
    8. Deep down, I would really like to have royal blood and live in 16th century England or France.
    9. I enjoy ballet or opera three times more than sex.
    10. I really like to flirt. But only to flirt. Bedtime is not for me. I am content with an intellectual relationship.

    • I'm a scorpio. 😂😂 I adore my zodiac. I'll say it's stupid that you don't communicate. Because not everything depends on the zodiac, we are all different. That's how the zodiac believes and I.. more in character. But not everything matches 🙂 they say scorpions are vengeful. It's not good for me, I've never flirted with anyone 😂😂 and the advice is don't flirt with everyone 🙂 because you can ruin someone's relationship without knowing it... because flirting is acceptable for some people. Not for others. Don't flirt with married men.

  • For 17. I remember when I visited a harmonious couple. lt and there was a questionnaire and there was a question about when does sexual desire appear and I chose that a person becomes sexual and desirable to me when I communicate with him. It then made fun of me and said goodbye. It was a long time ago and until I read this post of yours I didn't understand what was making fun of me there. And it turns out that you see something bad here :DD among my friends there are many people for whom sexual desire is not a priority, for them relationships and communication are more important, so I didn't even think that someone could consider it bad here 🙂
    And anyway, I only came here for those clarifications. I envy you such self-knowledge! ♥

    • Ha, yes, it is very incomprehensible to some people... But nothing, just surround yourself with people who understand! Thanks for joining!! 🙂

  • It's really very strange that I haven't told anyone this, but very often (especially when walking or driving somewhere) I create various versions of all kinds of accidents, apocalypses, etc., after which only I would be the only one left alive. I make up a whole story of what I would do next, where I would get food and supplies, where I would go and where I would live... Maybe it's not too strange, but I haven't told anyone yet...

  • Sometimes, although maybe more precisely lb often, I want to be invisible in the city, in public space and walk around the city so that no one can see. I don't like it and I feel very uncomfortable when especially strangers stare at me. Any communication costs me a lot of energy, because when I think about why, I understand that in every situation I play some role, I behave differently with different people, I try to adapt to them, to understand them, it's like some kind of constant psychoanalysis...:)

  • I read it interestingly and thought about it... I'm too open, I notice that and sometimes I wonder if it doesn't get stuck...
    The secret fact that maybe no one knows is that after forever taking care of everyone around me, I already want a vacation from everything

  • I completely agree with you that Facebook sucks people and distorts reality a lot

  • I constantly eat unconsciously and often because of this my stomach is flat and I spoil the air and silence.

  • I will tell you a very frank thing 🙂 no one knows this. Only the relatives will know now and Daniel is here 😂😊 I don't know if it's good or not. I dont think so . This is an idea. But when I listen to music. I will dance. You're going to dance like that 😂😂😊 it relaxes me. And it helps to take a break from everything. I charge like this. I don't know why I do this openly, but I do... As a child, I really liked to swing on the swing. And now I do it when I'm listening to music or when I'm very stressed. When I'm very sick. But I don't always do it. How ever 🙂

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