Do you know the ONE thing that would make the world about 400% better? I know. And although it may seem elementary, it is sorely lacking in our lives.
For the first time the combination of words "peaceful people" I heard a few months ago when I visited a non-traditional Montessori school. The teacher we interviewed explained that one of their goals is to educate peaceful people. This was the idea of Maria Montessori, the founder of this educational system.
I may have heard this phrase before, but this time it stuck with me. I was surrounded by teachers who loved their work, understood the importance of educating children and felt their dedication to raising a better generation.
NEW: You can also listen to the article - voiced by a girl from Debesy Justina Pilkaitė:
It has been some time since visiting the school...
The thought of peaceful people never left my mind. First of all, of course, I thought: Am I a peaceful person?
I don't like aggression, anger and stress. When a conflict breaks out, I never attack another person, I try to find a civilized, cultural way out of an unpleasant situation. And only when my patience runs out, I start thinking about other methods. I consider myself a peaceful person.
But what is a peaceful person?
How does he live? What features does it have? What are the thoughts in his mind? How do you react to difficult situations and what solutions do you choose?
Of course, peace in this age is not the same as it was a few hundred years ago. We don't need to defend ourselves from thugs who, after stealing the cows, also rape the eldest daughter. Peace does not come from the fact that bandits passed through your farm after all.
Modern peace is all about the little things. The little things we do in our daily lives in our interactions with those around us every day.
I would describe peaceful people as calm, self-confident, loving and respectful of nature and everything related to it, friendly, compassionate and sincere.
These are the qualities that separate a nice person from someone most people would shy away from.
What do we really want?
I think there is no doubt about the kind of society we would like to live in. And if someone still has doubts about this, and thinks that living among peaceful people would not be interesting, and therefore does not want to have anything to do with hippies, Buddhists and altruists, I suggest asking yourself this question:
If you had to move, which town would you choose?
I know which one I would choose.
And yes, I realize it only sounds nice on a computer screen. No one has ever seen or heard of such a peaceful town that built itself and inhabited only by peaceful people. It is probably impossible for such a place to exist. There will always be one evil person everywhere who will mess things up and spread negativity.
However, there are communities that have been deliberately established to live peacefully and without anger. The closest one to us is right here in Lithuania - Indrajas Namai.
And prejudice does not help.
There are people in my environment who rarely see a way out of life's "tossing and turning" without conflict. If the mobile company has calculated the bill incorrectly, they must:
- Damn that company.
- He will call and express his dissatisfaction.
- Even after the employee explains everything and corrects the mistake, they will still talk about the situation with all their friends.
Such people, for some reason, never seek a peaceful solution in the first place. They are convinced that nothing will be achieved by communicating with institutions or their employees.
...They believe that they are always and everywhere being cheated or exploited.
But is this really true? Or maybe it's just the inner world of a person who longs for conflicts and opportunities to show their supremacy against some institution, service provider?
Of course, these are just a few examples. There are also smaller disagreements, which non-peaceful people, however, do not want to resolve with a nice one.
By being open with ourselves, we avoid internal conflicts and remorse.
I have also had cases when I was angry with certain institutions and employees because of various inconsistencies or poor quality of services. I ran out of patience when I started explaining everything, but I never once lost my self-control and I'm happy about that.
Now I am not ashamed of my actions, because I did not spoil the person sitting on the other end of the line to a person moods or even whole days.
Oh, in the end, and the matter itself turned out to be just a misunderstanding or was corrected. You have to remember that there is a real person sitting on the other end of the phone who is just doing his job. 1 He also has the limits of patience, he too can be offended and get on his nerves.
Therefore, a peaceful person will never attack a bank employee who is only doing his job, that is, serving customers over the phone, because such a person does not want to harm another person and spoil his mood.
Do not do unto others what...
I often get comments that I am naive. There is some truth in that. But I am also peaceful. Where to draw the line between peacefulness and naivety?
- If I sympathize with a stranger who didn't do his job perfectly and put an error in my order because I think "he might be going through a tough time," am I naive?
- If the owner of the apartment did not sign a new internet contract on time and because of this I am forced to use very slow internet, but I do not attack him, but simply listen to the explanation calmly and understand that he is only human, am I naive because of this?
- If the cashier doesn't say "hello" and "goodbye" to me when I greet her kindly, but continues to scan the goods with a sour face, and I just think: maybe she's in pain... Am I naive?
Of course, all those people could be just plain lazy and totally give a shit about their jobs and the people they serve.
...But it's this kind of behavior that makes me choose to break this horrible cycle and to be naive, but peaceful, and influence those around you by your example.
Well, let's say we're peaceful…
What's next? What's the point? Maybe others are doing just fine without trying to be peaceful. Of course, we all know such people. But is it really good to be peaceful? Or could it be better?
The most peaceful people in the world are probably Buddhists. Buddhism teaches that true happiness comes from a person's inner peace. If a person's thoughts are peaceful, any external stimuli will not disarm him, but if a person's thoughts are disturbed or angry, nothing will make him happy.
Anger destroys inner peace.
And these are not old-fashioned clothes. This is also confirmed by the analyzes of scientists, such as, for example, these by the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Numerous studies show a link between a peaceful and compassionate lifestyle and happiness.
Labels can be applied, calling others hippies and naïves or even labeling them as Buddhists. And you can simply choose to be peaceful so that there is at least one more peaceful person in the world.
- Experiences less stress.
- Not angry, aggressive.
- Love yourself and others.
- Experiences many positive emotions.
- Copes with difficult situations more easily.
- Takes responsibility for your actions.
- Has a larger circle of friends.
Does it pay to be peaceful?
I, having gathered the courage, will return to the Montessori school and shake the hand of the teacher who is trying to raise peaceful children, a peaceful new generation.
I am happy to know that someone understands the importance of peace and is trying to change at least a small part of this world for the better.
We don't need bullies in the streets and gossipers in the shops. We really don't need sour faces in every public office and rude bus drivers. We just need to remember that we are equal. We all want a pleasant everyday life and friendliness around us. We want to be greeted with a smile and see you off with it.
So why not start with yourself?
I declare war on evil men and women, and against every piercing look or rude answer I will fight with a smile and a good mood.
I invite you to join me! 🙂
- Milena Kolesinskaitė
I know how worn out this phrase is...↩