You will surprise me if you say that you do not face difficulties in life. Do you meet? And I face. Everyone is facing. Overcoming those difficulties burns a lot of calories and brain cells.
Although it's nice to overcome them, don't you sometimes dream: "It would be nice if everything was easier"? Debesyla asks this too, and I answer - yes, I know. I will share a thousand-year-old principle that will make everything easier to do.
There are more such principles, but I have chosen one of the strongest. So hang on, you're about to go up in the air (because you'll feel the lightness).
What could be difficult?
Before talking about ease, it is necessary to understand what is the difficulty that we are going to raise here. Difficulties in life are actions that we must take and which require a lot of energy, effort, preparation, determination. So much so that shouts of “Just do it!” just don't work.
Difficulties are of three types - mind, communication and body:
- It can be difficult for the mind to make a decision, choose between several alternatives, generate ideas, figure out how to solve one or another task in life.
- There were also many difficulties in communication - after all, it can be difficult to apologize, ask for a favor or help, it is difficult to speak in public, to announce unpleasant news, it is difficult to negotiate.
- The body experiences difficulties when we force it to do physical exercises, to follow a regime, a diet, it is difficult to stand up and go out, when something chokes, it is also difficult to give something in the mouth. (If you apply the principle, everything will be easier. Both good and bad deeds.)
And why is it difficult?
Because many of these actions become so entangled in a web of reflections and evaluations that you no longer begin to catch yourself: it is good or bad, to do it or not, whether I want it or not. You start to think that others are unimportant, ugly, won't like it, then it becomes irrelevant, then motivation disappears and then you have to force yourself to take action and the action becomes sooooo hard... that you don't want to do anything at all.
It is said that "do it now and don't wait!". Then, you won't have time to get involved in excessive analyses. Maybe so, but we are talking about those cases when "Just do it!" doesn't work.
What to do?
A thousand-year-old principle that no one uses.
Stop judging everything. I mean, don't try to name, classify, rank, compare, describe, define, score, weight, label, or stereotype.
Accept everything as it is at that moment.
When I talk about what you don't need to do, it would seem like it's simple - you don't do it and that's it, but you know, you won't be able to stop evaluating all of a sudden. You will have to constantly remind yourself that you don't need to evaluate, observe, or you haven't started to evaluate, and if you have started, immediately remind yourself again - "I try not to evaluate anything in advance, I accept it as it is at that moment".
The Bible says "Judge not and ye shall not be judged." Understand - if you don't try to squeeze others into the framework of your invented rating scale, you yourself will be free from those frameworks of yours.
Buddhist scriptures speak of shunyata (emptiness) and that every object in the world is shunyata (emptiness). This means that no object has any evaluation by itself, evaluations and descriptions are invented by people.
Here's what happens when you try to evaluate the task before solving it:
- First of all, you waste a lot of energy deciding whether it's black or white, green or yellow.
- Sometimes you get caught up in internal deliberations and can't make up your mind - whether it's green or yellow. Then everything stops altogether and you have to postpone the work for the next day.
- If you fail to evaluate, frustration sets in and you feel like you don't understand what needs to be done. Although the action itself that needed to be done is clear.
- If the assessment is successful, then it starts to seem that you already know how everything will be and then either there is a fear that everything will be bad and you no longer want to do anything, or it starts to seem that everything will be fine anyway and you also no longer want to do anything.
- The worst thing is that the ratings that are so difficult to assign start to seem absolutely correct and indisputable, and that everyone else in the world would give the same ratings. This is where most of the conflicts come from.
If you get rid of the habit of evaluating everything, it will become easier, because only the action itself that needs to be done will remain, unencumbered by meanings, classifications, comparisons, names, descriptions.
When there is only the action left, you can think about how to do it, no longer have to deal with the moral problems that you associate with it quite unnecessarily.
Here are the benefits that await when you stop judging…
First: When you stop judging, you free up a lot of energy.
Because assigning ratings takes a lot of mental effort. Instead of trying to decide whether the ice cream is red or blue, you just eat it. Do the same with more serious problems - don't try to judge whether an idea is good or bad before sharing it - say it and then let others judge it. Before going to the gym, don't try to assess whether you will be able to lose (or gain - here's how) 2 kg this week or not - just exercise.
Second: When there is no judgment, fear is reduced.
We're back to ice cream again. If you don't try to measure the temperature of the ice cream, you won't be afraid of freezing your tongue. After all, you know that ice cream won't freeze your tongue, but the mystical -5°C can seem ominous. If you don't try to estimate how many people are listening to your message in the audience, you will be more confident. After all, "half-empty hall" sounds bolder than "100 people". If you let go of the common-sense assumption that 50% drivers are road eagles, it will be less scary to drive.
Third: When there is no judgment left, no emotion gets in the way.
If you don't try to estimate how many points the ice cream would score on the "healthy food" scale, it will be easier to eat it because you won't feel guilty. If you don't think of beggars as "alms collectors", you can easily pass them by without anger. If you don't rate lying in bed at one hundred percent on the "bliss scale", lying down will bring less joy and it will be easier to get up.
Fourth: When there is no judgment left, there is no need to fight yourself.
If you label yourself a "vegetarian," you're dooming yourself to struggle with ice cream cravings (if, again, let's say you have one). Homo sapiens is not a vegetarian, this is new age fiction. If you rate the company you work for as "capitalist pigs" or "African child exploiters", you will really have to push yourself to get to work.
Fifth: When there is no judgment, there is no need to struggle with the imagined reaction of those around you.
If you don't think that only gluttons eat ice cream, it will be easier to eat it, because it won't be scary to appear as a glutton. If you don't treat speaking your mind as something that only "sassy people" do, it will be easier to speak your mind without fear of upsetting others. After all, another person will say that ice cream is eaten by "gourmets", and "intelligent people" express their opinion.
Sixth: When there is no judgment left, the mind is freed from habitual thought patterns.
As long as you don't describe ice cream on a stick as "eaten on a stick", then you can eat it however you like. Place in a glass, pour peach juice and hang with a spoon. Mmm... If you don't describe a newspaper as a "readable item", you can use it as toilet paper. If you don't describe the stool as a "sitting thing", you can create it for firewood.
When you assign a description, the description immediately tells you what to do.
"Student" means to learn. "Worker" means to work. And why can't both one and the other create? "Writer" - writes. "Entrepreneur" - makes money. And why can't both dream?
One of the fundamental principles of a brainstorming session is not to evaluate the ideas expressed. He said - you wrote it down. Only when enough ideas have been generated, it is possible to evaluate them and select the best ones.
Underestimating is an old and widely known principle in business, but few use it in everyday life.
I have even received such comments that if you try to do business without evaluation, you will immediately go bankrupt. The truth is that the idea to write this article came to me precisely from observing business people.
They have just perfectly mastered the ability to take action, sometimes without even weighing all the pros and cons, without thinking about the far-reaching consequences for society or employees. They don't follow the rules, they make them.
Towards the ideal!
If you don't mind what is the meaning of life, you will not try to evaluate your life, it will be easier to live. If you don't try to appreciate other people, 1 it will be easier to communicate with them. If you don't try to value yourself, 2 you will free yourself from your own framework and it will be easier.
After all, when a musician creates music, he creates what is on his mind, with the instrument he is good at. Then the appreciators come and say "this is jazz, good jazz".
What if he tried to hit some good jazz right away? Would your favorite style of music have appeared then?
Evaluations close us, lock us in the world of already invented things. If you want to move freely and easily, without bumping into the limitations created by someone else, stop using other people's judgments.
I'm not a writer, I just write. The question is not who you are, but what you do? Don't bother to evaluate yourself, those who will write your biography will do it.