{"id":1141,"date":"2016-12-22T19:33:17","date_gmt":"2016-12-22T16:33:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danieliusg.lt\/?p=1141"},"modified":"2021-07-07T17:56:16","modified_gmt":"2021-07-07T14:56:16","slug":"pasiteisinimas-kodel-prievartauju","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/2016\/attaisnojums-kapec-es-izvaroju\/","title":{"rendered":"<i>[V\u0113stule]<\/i> Iegansts, lai piespiestu tevi m\u012bl\u0113t mani"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"font-size: 0.8em;\">Dienas m\u0113r\u0137is: <a style=\"border: none;\" href=\"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/issukis-365\/\">242 v\u0101rdi<\/a>. Rakst\u012bts: <b>1141<\/b>.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 1.15em;\">Sveika Simona,<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Es rakstu tie\u0161i \u0161eit, jo \u0161\u012bs v\u0113stules ir saist\u012btas. Es pamodos no d\u012bvaina sap\u0146a par zemesriekstu sviesta un k\u016bku r\u016bpn\u012bc\u0101m... Un, labi, es nezinu, vai jums to vajag, bet es tikai gribu paskaidrot, k\u0101p\u0113c es tagad izdaru uz jums tik lielu psiholo\u0123isku spiedienu (un pag\u0101tn\u0113). K\u0101p\u0113c es tevi izvaroju?<\/p>\n<p>Vai tu esi ieinteres\u0113ts?<\/p>\n<p>\u0160aj\u0101 mirkl\u012b es izt\u0113lo\u0161os klusum\u0101 pam\u0101ju un sakniebtu l\u016bpas. cik bie\u017ei j\u016bs to dar\u0101t<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">* * *<\/p>\n<p>Es saprotu, ka mans spiediens jums nesniedz neko \u013coti pat\u012bkamu. Ka tev ir ne\u0113rti. Ka tev ar katru manu tulkojumu paliek arvien gr\u016bt\u0101k... Un tu visp\u0101r vairs negribi ar mani neko dar\u012bt. Tas ir neizb\u0113gami.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Ja es var\u0113tu redz\u0113t (varb\u016bt man ir) citu ce\u013cu, es to izv\u0113l\u0113tos. Bet tas ir jaut\u0101jums: es neredzu.<br \/>\nES neredzu.<\/p>\n<p>M\u0113s run\u0101jam jau tr\u012bs m\u0113ne\u0161us, un es jums arvien maz\u0101k atveros. Jo k\u0101dreiz man \u0161\u0137ita... T\u0101 pat\u012bkam\u0101 saj\u016bta, kad k\u0101dam citam interes\u0113 un r\u016bp, ko tu saki. Tajos laikos es noteikti tevi apreibin\u0101ju pamaz\u0101m vair\u0101k un vair\u0101k...<\/p>\n<p>Man k\u0101dreiz bija interesanti tev\u012b klaus\u012bties. Pat interesant\u0101k nek\u0101 run\u0101t par sevi. Es k\u0101dreiz izklaid\u0113jos ar jums sp\u0113l\u0113jot sp\u0113les, saucot viens otru par lod\u0101m un vienk\u0101r\u0161i izbaudot mirkli. Br\u012bdis!<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Bet tad ir dienas, kad tie br\u012b\u017ei nezina, k\u0101p\u0113c un kur tie paz\u016bd.<\/p>\n<p>Un es nesaprotu. Esmu pazudis. Es vairs nesp\u0113ju justies br\u012bva un laim\u012bga ar to, kas man ir... Laikam saraucu pieri, k\u0101 tu saki. Bet tas joproj\u0101m neizskaidro, k\u0101p\u0113c es uz tevi izdaru spiedienu.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">* * *<\/p>\n<p>Ziniet, rakstot \u0161o v\u0113stuli es cen\u0161os p\u0101r\u0101k neiedzi\u013cin\u0101ties un p\u0101r\u0101k nedom\u0101t par jau padom\u0101to. Es ceru, ka man tas izdosies.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>K\u0101p\u0113c lai es izv\u0113l\u0113tos tevi?<\/li>\n<li>Ko es sagaidu no j\u016bsu atbildes?<\/li>\n<li>K\u0101 es pie\u0146em\u0161u tavu atbildi?<\/li>\n<li>Vai es visp\u0101r gaidu tavu atbildi?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Un dro\u0161i vien j\u016bsu pr\u0101t\u0101 virmo citi l\u012bdz\u012bgi jaut\u0101jumi, vai ne? Es m\u0113\u0123in\u0101\u0161u atbild\u0113t.<\/p>\n<p>* P\u0113c da\u017eu min\u016b\u0161u pauzes. *<\/p>\n<p>Labi, varb\u016bt man ir gr\u016bti nedom\u0101t. \u013baujiet man ieelpot, izelpot... Un es rakst\u012b\u0161u, it k\u0101 es run\u0101tu.<\/p>\n<p>Sima... Tagad man liekas, ka uzvedos k\u0101 mazs b\u0113rns, kur\u0161 alkst uzman\u012bbas un konkr\u0113t\u012bbas pasaul\u0113. Bet uztveriet to nevis k\u0101 piespie\u0161anu, bet k\u0101... Sirsn\u012bbu. Atkl\u0101t\u012bba.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Zini, kad es tevi pirmo reizi satiku septembra pirmaj\u0101 dien\u0101 Vi\u013c\u0146as stacij\u0101, uzgaid\u0101maj\u0101 telp\u0101 uz soli\u0146a lasot gr\u0101matu... Laikam iem\u012bl\u0113jos tev\u012b no pirm\u0101 acu skatiena.<\/p>\n<p>Es nezinu, k\u0101p\u0113c, es nezinu, k\u0101... Bet es to jutu. T\u0101 maz\u0101 dzirkstele. Un, lai ar\u012b m\u016bsu tik\u0161an\u0101s bija tik vid\u0113ja, man t\u0101 patika.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Kad atgriezos m\u0101j\u0101s Kau\u0146\u0101, nevar\u0113ju tevi izmest no galvas. Es to vairs nevar\u0113ju izdar\u012bt, lai ar\u012b kas. Es toreiz jaut\u0101ju draugiem, kas ar mani notiek... Ko man dar\u012bt.<\/p>\n<p>Vai man cer\u0113t tevi nosk\u016bpst\u012bt otrreiz vai aizmirst, l\u012bdz atgriez\u012b\u0161os no \u010cehijas un tad turpin\u0101t ies\u0101kto.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">P\u0113c draugu padoma (un manas v\u0113lmes) jaut\u0101\u0161anas tom\u0113r tikos otrreiz. Un es nosk\u016bpst\u012bju.<\/p>\n<p>Un taj\u0101 dien\u0101 es pirmo reizi sajutu nenoteikt\u012bbu. Tu biji pirm\u0101 meitene, kura uz manu sk\u016bpstu rea\u0123\u0113ja \u0161\u0101di... Atgr\u016bdo\u0161i, auksti un nesaprotami. Un apmald\u012bjos, neko nesapratu... \u0160\u0137iet, ka toreiz rakst\u012bju l\u012bdz\u012bgu v\u0113stuli - nezinu. Tad es dom\u0101ju, ka tas ir tikai j\u016bsu \u012bpa\u0161ais sazi\u0146as veids. Ka esi uzman\u012bgs k\u0101 ka\u0137is un gudrs k\u0101 zvirbulis.<\/p>\n<p>\u2026Bet p\u0113c tam, kad es aizbraucu, \u0161ie nenoteikt\u012bbas kalni\u0146i turpin\u0101ja n\u0101kt un g\u0101ja. Es tev pajaut\u0101tu tie\u0161i un tu aizb\u0113gtu. Es jaut\u0101ju abstrakti, bet j\u016bs neatbild\u0113j\u0101t. Es neko nejaut\u0101ju... Un joproj\u0101m sird\u012b jutos ne\u0113rti.<\/p>\n<p>(Dievs, es tev to visu past\u0101st\u012btu dz\u012bvaj\u0101, ja var\u0113tu. K\u013c\u016bst arvien lab\u0101k un lab\u0101k, vai ne?)<\/p>\n<p>* Atkal pauzes. *<\/p>\n<p>P\u0113d\u0113jo m\u0113ne\u0161u laik\u0101 es var\u0113ju l\u0113n\u0101m nolob\u012bt tavus kr\u0101su un tape\u0161u sl\u0101\u0146us un redz\u0113t, k\u0101di sienas gleznojumi sl\u0113pjas uz tav\u0101m iek\u0161\u0113j\u0101m sien\u0101m... Lai gan tu nebiji \u013coti, \u013coti atv\u0113rta un atdev\u012bga... Tom\u0113r tu l\u0113n\u0101m atv\u0113ries.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Bet es nesaprotu, Simona, vai tu tie\u0161\u0101m gribi atv\u0113rties... Nu es nezinu? Uz debes\u012bm un t\u0101l\u0101k?<\/p>\n<p>Vai k\u0101dreiz v\u0113lies un j\u016bti to neapturamo saj\u016btu sav\u0101 sird\u012b, kad m\u012bli, v\u0113lies b\u016bt kop\u0101 ar m\u012b\u013coto un dar\u012bt jautras lietas... Bet nezini k\u0101p\u0113c?<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Es to nesaprotu.<\/p>\n<p>Es to nesaprotu, un tas mani trauc\u0113. Ir pag\u0101ju\u0161i gandr\u012bz \u010detri m\u0113ne\u0161i.<\/p>\n<p>* Vi\u0146\u0161 aiziet un uzvelk d\u017eemperi, jo nez k\u0101p\u0113c k\u013cuvis v\u0113ss. *<\/p>\n<p>J\u0101, atz\u012b\u0161os. ES esmu iem\u012bl\u0113jies. iem\u012bl\u0113jies tev\u012b<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Un Dievs, k\u0101 es ilgojos, lai tu mani m\u012bl\u0113tu.<\/p>\n<p>Kaut k\u0101 es \u013c\u0101vu jums aiz\u0146emt lielu da\u013cu no manas dz\u012bves. Pirm\u0101s domas no r\u012bta un p\u0113d\u0113j\u0101s domas pirms aizmig\u0161anas. Un da\u017ereiz pa vidu.<\/p>\n<p>J\u016bsu d\u0113\u013c es varu main\u012bt savus pl\u0101nus. Iera\u0161an\u0101s Vi\u013c\u0146\u0101 nakts vid\u016b. D\u0101vanu pasnieg\u0161ana un br\u012bvdienu pl\u0101no\u0161ana. B\u016bt lab\u0101kam par mani... Un pie\u0146emt to, ko tu man dod.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">J\u0101, es esmu traks.<\/p>\n<p>Bet es esmu ar\u012b traka m\u012blest\u012bb\u0101, t\u0101p\u0113c man tas viss \u0161\u0137iet dabiski. Nopietni. Es var\u0113tu dar\u012bt sav\u0101d\u0101k, bet es nemaz negribu!<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Sird\u012b deg v\u0113lme b\u016bt kop\u0101.<\/p>\n<p>Un tu vi\u0146am saki, ko v\u0113lies \u2013 nedom\u0101, nedari, negaidi, neesi tas un tas... Bet vai tu dom\u0101, ka vi\u0146\u0161 klaus\u0101s?<\/p>\n<p>Mirkli \u0161\u0137iel\u0113dams, vi\u0146\u0161 skat\u0101s uz sauli, kas iznira aiz cepel\u012bna kr\u0101sas m\u0101ko\u0146iem. Aukst\u0101 ziemas saule sp\u012bd tikpat spo\u017ei k\u0101 vasar\u0101.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Bet \u0161eit tas ir.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Mana sirds man saka: &quot;Esi kop\u0101, Daniel, vai neesi visp\u0101r.&quot; Dariet visu iesp\u0113jamo.&quot;<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Un es daru visu iesp\u0113jamo.<\/p>\n<p>Ja atbilde nav ac\u012bmredzama un es to neredzu, es to jaut\u0101ju tie\u0161i. Es piespie\u017eu, jo sav\u0101d\u0101k nevar... Kaut k\u0101.<\/p>\n<p>* Ietur pauzi. *<\/p>\n<p>ES tevi nesaprotu. Es neredzu tev cauri un pat neredzu tevi.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><strong>T\u0101p\u0113c es jaut\u0101ju:<\/strong> Un ko tu j\u016bti? ko tu j\u016bti<\/p>\n<p>Vai j\u016btat dedzino\u0161u v\u0113lmi b\u016bt kop\u0101, neskatoties uz \u0161\u0101diem maniem p\u0101rk\u0101pumiem? Vai varb\u016bt nev\u0113lies b\u016bt, jo, piem\u0113ram, es slikti akcent\u0113ju v\u0101rdus vai dz\u012bvoju Kau\u0146\u0101? Vai varb\u016bt pats neko nezini un nesaproti?<\/p>\n<p>* Smaida. *<\/p>\n<p>Un zini... Es tikai gribu atbildi \u2013 tu to \u013coti gribi vai negribi visp\u0101r.<\/p>\n<p>L\u012bdz\u012bgs l\u0113mums k\u0101 es pie\u0146emu ar vis\u0101m liet\u0101m, darbiem, m\u0113r\u0137iem, hobijiem un cilv\u0113kiem sav\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113 \u2013 es sev jaut\u0101ju, vai es to gribu vai n\u0113. Un, ja es negribu vai nezinu (un, galvenais, es jau sen nezinu) - tad es no t\u0101 atsakos.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u0160is ir vienk\u0101r\u0161as dz\u012bves princips:<\/strong> Ir maz\u0101k. Jo maz\u0101k jums ir, jo vair\u0101k ener\u0123ijas varat koncentr\u0113ties. Jo vair\u0101k sp\u0113si koncentr\u0113ties, jo vair\u0101k sasniegsi.<\/p>\n<p>Esmu p\u0101rliecin\u0101ts, ka tas pal\u012bdz\u0113s ar\u012b jums. Ej - atbildi &quot;n\u0113&quot; vai &quot;es nezinu&quot; (man lik\u0101s, ka tu nezini kop\u0161 septembra) un viss - tu atbr\u012bvojies no manis k\u0101 probl\u0113mas. Saki &quot;j\u0101&quot; \u2013 un var\u0113si turpin\u0101t baud\u012bt visu ce\u013co\u0161anas, atkl\u0101jumu, p\u0101rv\u0113rt\u012bbu un atkl\u0101smju prieku.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Un neatkar\u012bgi no t\u0101, ko j\u016bs atbildat:<\/strong> Es aicinu j\u016bs piem\u0113rot \u0161o principu visas dz\u012bves garum\u0101. Jo tas darbojas tik labi.<\/p>\n<p>* Ietur pauzi. *<\/p>\n<p>Bet \u0161eit es atkal tevi izvaroju. Piedod... es varu nojaust, cik tas ir s\u0101p\u012bgi... Vai varb\u016bt tas tevi vienk\u0101r\u0161i atgr\u016b\u017e un tikai pace\u013c tavu sienu v\u0113l augst\u0101k.<\/p>\n<p>Es izroku sev bedri un tu cel augstu sienu.<\/p>\n<p><iframe title=\"Bastion-Build That Wall (Zia&#039; t\u0113ma)\" width=\"1050\" height=\"788\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/Jz8c17upEwM?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>* L\u016bdz dziesmu.*<\/p>\n<p>Ja es zin\u0101tu, ko dar\u012bt lab\u0101k, es to dar\u012btu. Bet es nezinu. Piedod par to.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">* * *<\/p>\n<p>Un t\u0101... Man \u0161\u0137iet, ka esmu tik daudz palaidis gar\u0101m, man \u0161\u0137iet, ka es var\u0113tu rakst\u012bt un rakst\u012bt. Bet man \u0161odien b\u016bs j\u0101pabeidz v\u0113stule.<\/p>\n<p>Ja gribi, lai es kaut ko pagarinu, paskaidro sav\u0101d\u0101k vai ja kaut ko nesaproti, saki un es tev uzrakst\u012b\u0161u. Man pat\u012bk tev rakst\u012bt. It \u012bpa\u0161i, ja zinu, ka tu lasi.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">Ak, un es? <strong>Un k\u0101 es atbild\u0113tu uz sev uzdoto jaut\u0101jumu?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Es teiktu, j\u0101, es v\u0113los turpin\u0101t piedz\u012bvojumu ar jums. Es gribu izdar\u012bt pusotru miljonu trak\u0101ko lietu un v\u0113l tr\u012bs miljonus, kas nav tik traki, bet tom\u0113r jautri.<\/p>\n<p>Bet nedom\u0101jiet, ka es v\u0113los kaut k\u0101 ietekm\u0113t j\u016bsu atbildi un j\u016bsu j\u016btas. Es negribu tevi, ietekm\u0113t\u0101 vide. Es gribu tikai tevi, tevis iespaidotu... Nu un varb\u016bt pat tavus lab\u0101kos draugus un \u0123imeni - tavu m\u0101ti.<\/p>\n<p>Un tagad un atkal - l\u012bdz tre\u0161dienai! Es ceru, ka j\u016bsu darbs iet labi.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Daniels<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p style=\"font-size: 0.8em;\">Dienas m\u0113r\u0137is: <a style=\"border: none;\" href=\"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/issukis-365\/\">242 v\u0101rdi<\/a>. Rakst\u012bts: <b>1141<\/b>.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":14763,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[2,69],"class_list":{"0":"post-1141","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-laiskai","8":"tag-365-tekstai","9":"tag-meile"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1141","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1141"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1141\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14763"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1141"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1141"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/debesyla.lt\/uzrasai\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1141"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}